Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Gunny Rain Brew, or Bunny Grain Stew, or something. And Sleestak are scary.

This is how runny my brain goo is today.

Imagine two or three thoughts, each encased in a ping-pong ball, trapped in a vat of cold molasses. When you want to express a thought, you have to reach in, move your hand around to find one, then grab it and try to pull it out. It takes a good five seconds sometimes to complete the process. That is my brain in the month or so surrounding the winter solstice.

Now imagine a hypersonice popcorn air-popping machine on crack, filled with THOUSANDS of ping-pong balls. You open the top to pull out a thought, and DOZENS fly out, and you have to crawl around on the floor and frantically look at each one, trying desperately to find the one you want. Once you do THAT, you have to corral all the others and put them back in the machine. It too can take a while to complete the process. From the outside, it can look very similar to my brain in wintertime, but from the inside, it is very different indeed. This is my brain around the summer solstice.

For instance, here are some of the things ping-ponging around inside my head right this very instant.

1. These three songs, all playing simultaneously at equal volume.

To approximate the experience, press play on all three. It doesn't really matter if you synch up the starts.

2. The word "month" should have a "u" in it, not an "o."

3. Why is it A "u," but AN "o"?

4. How I didn't put the lid back on the garbage can last Tuesday because it was an off-week for garbage bag use. Still, I SHOULD have put the lid back on, but it was never the PERFECT moment to do so, or if that moment DID happen, I missed it.

5. I don't understand the methodology for naming dinosaurs in the old LAND OF THE LOST. Spike, Emily, Dopey, Grumpy, Alice, and Junior seemed to apply to individuals, but Spot seemed to apply to ALL members of that particular species.

6. Marshall, Will & Holly repeatedly referred to the Sleestak as insectlike, when CLEARLY they were more reptilian. The only thing remotely insectoid about them was their eyes, and even THOSE were more spidery than insectlike.

Add to those the idea that I should change the name of this post to "The Summer Oranges," because what I'm experiencing right now is the polar opposite of the Winter Blues.

And the fact that "molasses" is a funny word when spoken. Not so much when written.

Uh-oh. Here comes Dope's cover of "You Spin Me Right Round" from the AMERICAN PSYCHO 2 soundtrack.

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