Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Chirp . . . Chirp . . . Chirp . . . Chirp *SQUIRT* . . . Chirp . . . Chirp . . . Chirp.

Made a trip to the farmer’s market this morning. Bought three big ‘maters for $3.00. Not too economical, but at least they were tax-free, and with the salmonella problems lately, I didn’t mind paying a little more so I could have ‘maters on my evening turkey sammich.

Got home and sat in the kitchen, figuring out my electricity and water usage for yesterday and trying to extrapolate it out to see how much I’d use for the month. An annoying little bird perched on top of my garage chirped every 2.25 seconds for more than ten minutes straight.

I grabbed the squirty little water bottle that I use to piss off Patches when she makes annoying meow sounds too much, and pointed it at the feathered offender. It chirped again. I squirted.

The mesh from the window screen dispersed the stream into an ineffectual mess.

Two and a quarter seconds later, the bird chirped again.

“Go be annoying somewhere else,” I commanded it.

It did not comply. Two and a quarter seconds later, it chirped yet again.

I gave up and closed the window.

2 comments:

Tom Hanna said...

Quoth the birdie, "Chirp."

The Last American said...

If you stand outside my window chirping, I'll squirt YOU, too!